How do you see yourself? If someone was to ask you to describe yourself, what would be your answer? Would you say ‘I am a teacher. I am a bank manager. I am a housewife. I am a mother. I am someone who likes dancing. I am a quitter. I am a victorious one. I am sick. I am healthy. What would be one of many many small subtexts that are running in the background? There is actually nothing wrong with that, it is your play. There are multitude of roles, that have all been conditioned and digested to such a degree that they are unconscious. They just seem to be who you are.
However if there is a willingness to recognise that everything you do, and what it is that you are in that very moment, it’s coming from something past. It’s actually very useful, problem is once you believe those rules who you are. If you are a sick person, then you are playing a role of a sick person. The world is bad. If you are healthy person, then you act like a healthy person and the world that surrounds you is good. If you can truly see clearly and recognise your role, your act, multidimensional, cosmic, transcended theatre. Divine theatre and there is an opportunity, however you need to allow space to recognise what is present in all roles. What does not move as you act your play? What is the truth of who you are?
I ask you, stop everything that you are doing. I do not mean to stop moving. This is a much deeper request. What I mean, stop every role that you are playing. You may be on a mission to seek peace, nirvana. And it may be a wonderful role that you are acting out. You may dress accordingly, perfect the right body language, facial expressions, adjust your voice and choice of words to fit your play, the script you rehearsed over and over again. You practise your meditations, yoga, research the literature, seek master tutors of enlightenment, hoping that they would give you more and more information, so that as your act follows, you can forever be giving out beauty, light, joy.
Stop everything, put your script aside. Stop and look around you. Meet your environment, people with eyes, mind and hearts beating in harmony. Not a cloud, a pre-learnt lines in a way, nothing blocking the connection, emotional connection. Experience no control, just a vast openness. Allow this emotion run through you with no attachments, no memories.
There is no need to travel far to eastern countries to discover this truth, to seek masters of peace. The essence of the teaching is what it is what you are looking for. That gives you choice, because you no longer run on pre-written script. You are now investigating by invitation, your own invitation. This is a choice based on I do not know. More deeper, more alive I do not know. And wait and see. This requires enormous amount of trust.
You may not be aware how much of information you have injected into yourself through media, leaders, parents. You may be living every day thinking that you are so wonderful and perfect and everyone else is bad. It is always someone else’s fault. The fear is that if we truly see who we are, it may be very bad news, because you play your role of loveliness for such a long time. Inside we are wretched, horrid, mean spirited person, who is selfish, greedy, lustful, superficial perfectionist, arrogant, inflated person.
It requires huge amount of trust, leap into no knowing. And there is a very good news. In that moment of not knowing, this is good news. If you stop, you are not seeking to know. Trust that you do not need to know. I really do not need to know, mind and heart meet and open.